You know what Maya did today? She took treats from a stranger. I know some people probably do not think this is a big deal. Your dogs take treats from strangers all the time, you may think, and indeed, it's getting them to stop that's the problem. It may also lessen your excitement to hear that the "stranger" was in fact our regular trainer.
But I am still pretty excited. Maya was communicative and polite, and was responding to cues from the trainer like "sit" and "touch" (and once, accidentally, to her hand signal for "stand on your hind legs and dance," which seriously confused our poor trainer and also Maya a little bit). Maya was wagging, loose, and eager to interact in a friendly fashion, provided plenty of delicious treats were involved. She had some nervous moments, and a few things pushed her a bit over the edge, but she was learning and having a great time.
It has been just under two years since we adopted Maya. I cannot even count the things she has learned since then, and we still have so much ground to cover. Every so often, someone tells me that they once had a dog "just like Maya," and that they had every approaching stranger hand the dog a cookie for several weeks, or maybe even months, until the dog was wagging its tail at everyone who passed. And I feel kind of bad, because it's taken us two years just to get to a point where my dog can, under very special and controlled circumstances, take treats from just one stranger. I think that maybe, if I'd done a better job or known more, this might have gone faster.
But I don't feel that bad, because honestly, there are no words to describe how big a deal such a simple action is to Maya. This is huge for her, and involved so much self-control and courage that she passed out in a heap as soon as she came home again. Slowly but surely, her paradigms are shifting. Her worldview may never be the same, and I may get to see my dog grow into the very best version of herself.
That's exciting.
Good girl, Maya! That is very exciting indeed.
ReplyDeleteDon't for a minute feel like she should be progressing faster. You've done such an amazing job with her, and even though you didn't know a lot in the beginning, you learned and you grew, which is more than many more experienced dog owners do.
Sometimes when people report fast and dramatic progress, what they mean by progress is not the same thing that you or I mean. So if they say that they once had a dog like Maya who was "cured" after a few months, what they might mean is that the dog no longer lunges or barks or engages in obvious displays. I've even known some people to report a problem solved when they develop better leash handling techniques and can physically control the dog. Obviously your standards, and what you define as success, are so much more than that. I don't mean to denegrate those who report fast and dramatic progress, of course sometimes such progress is genuine. But when someone tells you they fixed their Maya in a few short weeks, take it with a grain of salt.
Anyway, none of those other dogs is Maya, and she's moving at her pace, with your help. Your slow and steady approach, and your focus on her inner life and thoughts (feeling better about things, making good choices), means that the progress she does make is robust and lasting.
(this is Sarah. It won't let me post as me for some reason)
Thanks Sarah! You are right about the internal changes being profound. Watching Maya on Friday, I was struck by how hard her brain was working. She used to be a reactive dog -- all emotion, little self-control. Increasingly, she is a thinking dog. It's a pretty amazing difference in how she engages with the world, and just wonderful to see.
ReplyDeleteSlow but steady is fine with me!